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Meth Addict's Personal Stories

  • Mar
    02

    New Relationship and Meth Use

    New Relationship and Meth Use

    Hey I am Victoria, or Vicky; I go by both. I am 37. I have been addicted to caffeine and tobacco for years, and have also used marijuana on a regular basis for years. I have been widowed for 5 1/2 years now and for about 4 1/2 have been trying to find someone I could be happy with again. Then last year, October of 2002, I met a man who was perfect... 6'4",200 #s. Thick brown hair and gorgeous blue eyes, and the sharpest mind I had ever encountered. I mean I watched him fix everything, from lawn mowers, to cars, to electrical, to plumbing, to even a gut-shot dog.

    We live in Podunk, Texas. He was absolutely amazing in every way, and still is to me, though he has lost sight of that fact. The man can fix anything... except maybe himself.

    The first few months were bliss for me. He was having some problems... going through a divorce, some legal problems, loss of his building business, but I was convinced that I had found a man of intelligence and integrity. He met my kids, saved the dog, won our hearts. The first date he told me that he had recently lost about 60 pounds and felt better than he had in a long time. He also introduced me to "ice." We used it every few weeks and usually either partied with friends or puttered in the barn. I thought he was feeling the same way I was about it. Fun but nothing to work for or strive for. An occasional late night. But soon we were arguing all the time and then he was telling me that I couldn't handle the meth and that our (very real) other problems were all in my head, or that I just liked to fight.

    So it got to be very occasional that he shared with me, and he claimed that he was not using either, but he was always out very late and sometimes didn't come home at all. Then we decided to quit (a few times actually) and I have, but now he is home less than ever, very secretive, and leaves me stranded and things like that. Sometimes he denies use, sometimes not. His usual tactic is to accuse me of chewing on him and to just leave.

    I know from this site that some come back, and I am hoping that this is still possible, and that we can regain what we had, but I have a hard time taking the apathy and the back and forth. I feel a lot more hopeful after finding this site and am hoping that the obvious abundance of character present here might help carry us both through.


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