Teen Stories of Meth Abuse and Struggles

• Mar
  01

  I Am Still a Tweaker

  I was a happy little girl up to age 12. My life felt perfect. I got everything I wanted. I knew my mom wasn't my real mom and neither was my dad. They were really my aunt and uncle. I lived with them since I was 3 months. I found out my mom was a drug addict and she left me with my aunt and uncle, and my brother and 2 little sisters still lived with my real mom. I started thinking about why she left me and why she didn't come back for me. Still till this day I don't know. I talked to hear about it and she said she always wanted to come for me but my aunt would never let her take me because the way she was.

  Anyway, my aunt let me keep smoking weed when she found out I was a stoner. I then started crushing pills and snorting them just to know how it felt. I was so depressed thinking about my life. I was treated like shit at school. I was going to turn 13.

  One day, I went to a party and people were smoking bowls of meth and I was wanting to try it so bad. They passed it to me because they thought I did it. When I got the pipe, I asked them to light it for me. They said spin it. After that I never thought about my life and just went with my friend every day to smoke meth.

  We were having fun, or so I thought at the time. Every day smoking grams and only being only 12 years old. When at thirteen I started smoking rock. It ate away at my gums. One of my teeth is all cracked and broken cause of drugs and every one knows who I am. I'm just lonely with no friends my parents don't even really have a conversation with me cause they don't like to look at me all tweeked out. But that's who I am. Crystal is me and I am crystal.

  I can still remember that first nasty smell. Like something sweet in a nasty way. I just took a couple hits when it came around. I didn't sleep for about a month or so. I started feeling light headed and I was so weak because I never drank water not even 1 glass. For days on end, I was so dehydrated. I got up from the couch to fast and I went to talk to my brother in the kitchen and my eyes went to the back of my head and I fell on the floor and hit my head on the stove. My friend help me into the room and I laid down and about just 10 minutes later I woke up. He gave me milk which I didn't drink.

  When I went to school, I would hate it. Everyone was calling me crystal meth head and tweeker. Inside it made me feel so hurt, but I never showed it. My friends called me that too but just playing around. I act like it is funny and just go along with it. I lost a lot of friends because of my meth use. I always had a mom telling me to get out of their house and their kids couldn't talk to me.

  Now I'm 14 and I still use every day. I just smoked a bowl. Now I just sit in my room all day. I have no friends. Half my family acts like they don't know me. They see me at the store or walking and they don't even say hi. My cousins can't stay the night or talk to me because I'm the bad one in the family. I still can't spend time with my mom because I think her and my sister talk about me and sometime the call me slow or say "she's stupid; don't ask her to do anything". Well I've tried acid, heroin, rock, a lot of stuff and still if it comes around I'll do it. I can't stop it. Crystal and other drugs make me forget about all the stuff that's happened in my life. I've gone to boot camp. I always have counseling and they always bring up "DO YOU EVER GET HURT CAUSE YOU MOM LEFT YOU AND TOOK THE REST." I just go to my room and pack a bowl smoke away. Just holding the pipe makes me forget, and I sit in my room blowing out clouds and I wish I was never left out of my family.

  My name is Crystal and that doesn't make me feel any better; but I love to smoke it because it makes me happy. Or at least I think it does! I do wish I had never stared, but so does everyone else. If you are reading this, please realize that everyone in life who seems to be happy doing drugs, is really just killing themselves and wasting their life. I hope you care because I don't, at least not right now because I am a tweaker, and all I want is my glass pipe.
  
  Crystal

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  Posted on March 1st, 2011

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