2 Responses to Still Grieving

• REPLY

  Jackie

  January 11th, 2012

  I feel your pain! It's been one week since my ex and I broke up over meth. He had went to prison for three years for the drug and just got out in May. I met him after he went to prison, so I never really knew what to watch for. Our relationship was going great. He had a great job, we had our own place, and we were happy. We started having problems in December. He was always irritable and always seemed wore out. One day one of his friends were over and they stayed up until about four in the morning. It never clicked. We broke up about a week before Christmas and on Christams Eve I got a call that he was in the hospital and overdosed on meth. I was so shocked and so heartbroken. I didn't know what to say. We got back together and promised each other things would be different. He promised he would stop the drug. He was so tired and would eat and drink so much when he was coming down. He would say that he felt like he couldnt do anything, not even crawl out of bed. He was sick to his stomach and just felt awful. About a week ago we got into a fight and he said he was gonna go on a walk. Fifteen minutes later I got a text saying he was with his uncle. I knew right then he was using again. I was devastated. He chose meth over me. He says he loves me, but he doesn't want to be with me and that he doesn't want to quit using drugs. After all of this, I found out he was going to propose to me before he went back on the drugs. I even saw the rings. Its so hard to just let go of everything when I am still so in love with him and want so much more for him. I just don't know what to do anymore...

• REPLY

  Johnna Morgan

  February 21st, 2012

  I can feel your pain also, my current husband was a meth user and cocaine user, he went to prison, and got out and accepted the Lord into his life said he was a new person, and realized where he went wrong, and was clean to my knowledge while we were dating, we met at church, and we had a great life, we were falling in love and finally moved in with each other, he loved my girls, and my 9 year old, even wanted her to call him daddy, after we got married, and he asked me to marry him, and we did get married in our church on Dec 11th, 2011, we had a small ceremony but it was very nice, just very close friends and family, we had a very nice life going together, and a happy family, we even couldn't wait to go get our first family picture done, and it turned out great, well we were going to his hometown for Christmas, to see his family, and everything was great until he stayed out one night all night, when I questioned him as to where he was and he lied about it, and never returned back home, and when we did see each other, I could tell he was on meth, but after Christmas, celebration we were driving home, and we stopped at a store, and he took his stuff out of the car and took off on me and left me and my girls in a town we didn't know, and to drive home by ourselves, I got into an accident on the way home, I fell asleep, and we were all okay, but I was sad he left us for the drugs, and he has been gone now 71 days, still where he left us, won't talk to us, and when he does it is only to ask for money and profanity words, he has been with many woman since he has been there, and recently ended up in jail for possession drug paraphernalia, and he still won't talk to me, I love him with all my heart, and want him to get help and come back home to us, but I know he won't even when he gets out of jail, because he says he loves us, but he loves his drugs more than he loves us, I am so committed to him still haven't removed my wedding ring, from the day he put it on me, I just pray daily that he will have a change of heart, and decide to straighten out his life and be a husband and a dad again, because I don't know what to do, or where to turn anymore, I am so lost and feel helpless, I am still in so much love with him...